What Is That Silhouette In The Window?

“Are you sure you're not being sarcastic? You sound sarcastic.”

“I assure you I'm being sincere.”

“Well, since I can't see your face I'll have to take your word for it.”

“Do you want to lift the lid for a second and see?”

“I can't. I keep telling you, I'm a corpse.”

“Now, when you say corpse...”

“I died in 2007.”

“I see.”

“Again, I wish I could see your expression.”

“I am listening and I am open to your thoughts. I'm just trying to understand. For instance, how are you speaking?”

“Why is that important?”

“Because you should be inanimate.”

“I am inanimate! I'm a corpse!”

“All right. Obviously I've upset you. Would you like to discuss it?”

“You're focusing on the trivial. I wasn't dragged here by my personal gravediggers to discuss what it's like being a corpse.”

“Why are you here?”

“I was told that you were the most beautiful woman in this land, so I was going to ask you to be my queen and join me to rule the shadow realms. Except now I'm thinking, what does it matter if you're beautiful if I can never see or touch you, sealed as I am in this necronautical vessel for the rest of eternity? Also, I barely know you. Also, my enemies are everywhere, so you would be in constant danger if you accept. This was a terrible idea! I can't believe the undying seers talked me into this. How embarrassing. What a fuck-up.”

“I cosplay as Lady Death.”

“Holy shit! Hooray!”