“Your dumb sword
is balanced all wrong, you dress like Santa Claus, and you never let
us look behind the curtain, so we quit. Fuck you. Signed, everybody.”
“Eh.”
“This doesn't
worry you, Your Majesty? Literally everybody signed this.”
“You didn't.”
“Nobody asked me
to.”
“Well, they can
go fuck themselves. I quit too.”
“They didn't even
mention it.”
“Do you want a
peek behind the curtain?”
“What? Really?”
“Last chance
before I close up shop.”
“Wow! I've been
waiting forever for this. I bet it's something sexy. Is it sexy?”
“Go ahead and
find out.”
“Oh boy, oh boy.
This is so exciting. Look, my hands are shaking! I'll just part the
curtain here and slowly stick my head in... oh. This isn't sexy.”
“Of course not.
There's nothing sexy about hackneyed ahistorical simulations that
pass for entertainment for the nescient masses in a post-capitalist
society. Now let's go get drunk.”
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