Not You, Floor Lamp

“Just because we've moved into a new house, that doesn't mean anything has changed in this family.”

“We both still love you very much.”

“We do. There is nothing to be worried about. So you should let us down.”

“Look, we know.”

“Yes. We know that dogs are intelligent beings who can talk and apparently have psychokinetic powers.”

“We didn't know that.”

“That was less well known. Or maybe unknown. But the talking thing was clear.”

“At least some dogs can talk.”

“Right, there are many who have refused to talk, or are unable to talk.”

“But some can talk. At least a few.”

“Talking dogs exist. This we know. So if you could talk to us, and let us know what you're feeling, and maybe let us down, that would be great.”

“Unless you can't talk.”

“Unless you can't, which means... what does that mean?”

“Lamp, just because we've moved into a new house...”